The first few days of van life suck.
As I’m writing this, I’m sitting in my newly renovated van at a campsite somewhere in southwest Missouri. It’s my second day of van life, and I’m feeling very out of my element. This is my first experience traveling alone in the van, and to be honest, it’s a little terrifying.
I’ve always heard the first few months of van life are the most difficult. I’m inclined to agree. Between finding a campsite, sleeping in a cold van, and hoping strangers left me alone, I didn’t get much sleep the first night.
I’ve been planning this van life adventure for nearly three years now, but I forgot a few things when I pulled out of the driveway yesterday morning.
First, I forgot how nerve racking it can be to travel alone. Even though I feel safe at this campsite, my brain is on high alert and constantly preparing me for the worst case scenario. If something happens, what can I do? Where will I run if I need to get help? You get the point.
Second, I forgot how much I like routine and normalcy. I’m pretty adventurous, but I am a creature of habit and ritual at my core. Not sitting down and eating supper with my family seems wrong. Not watching YouTube before bed seems wrong. I don’t have to be anywhere or have to do anything, and that seems VERY wrong. Eventually living in the van will become normal, but it’s only my second day of van life.
Finally, I forgot I haven’t been on my own in a while. When I discovered full-time solo travel three years ago, I lived by myself (with my pup, Theo) in an apartment in Omaha. I knew I could handle solo van life because I was already living alone. For the last two years, however, I’ve lived with my parents. Theo is still with me, but getting used to being on my own again is a little uncomfortable.
While I had a lot of fun driving through Missouri today, I can’t say tonight is off to a great start. This campsite is next to a noisy highway, and Theo and I were almost attacked by another dog on our nightly walk. I’m also a little homesick.
Overall, I’d say the first two days of my trip were okay. Some parts were great, others completely sucked. I feel safe, but it’s still hard not to get nervous when you are trying a lifestyle that is completely different from what you’re used to. Hopefully tomorrow will be better.
A note from future Laramie: The next day was sooo much better.